The missing bridge

There's a bridge missing
Perhaps never constructed
Between your anger and my silence
Your anger isn't just anger
It's everything you don't say
Or can't
Stress, pain, disappointment
Even encouragement
Hides behind the cloak of your anger
The screaming muffles every voice
But it's still too loud
Loud, at least, for my silence
That retreats and shrivels and shrinks
And walks to another room to cry
And loses its voice
But not its meaning
And therefore all we do
Is wait for time to flow
Or the clouds to descend
So we stop noticing
The absence of the bridge
As always.

The moral dimension

To leadership.
To hard decisions.
To choices.
To life.


#HardToRememberStuff

Love, forbidden

If only they had never met
Or met when it wasn't forbidden to care
If only they had never spoken
If only everything was as easy to share
If only he could bear the gloom in her eyes
If only he didn't move mountains for her cheer
If only he didn't need her to live
If only needing her wasn't so unfair
If only he could help falling in love
If only he could rip his heart for her bare
If only he weren't afraid they wouldn't survive the truth
If only his love was stronger than his fear
If only his arms wouldn't ache to hold her
If only his eyes wouldn't shamelessly stare
If only it was enough to watch her from afar
But if it didn't hurt so much, it wouldn't be love my dear.

Itni shiddat se khud se lad rahe hain
Na jee rahe hain, na dhang se mar rahe hain
Bas os ki boondon se bikhar rahe hain
Daudte lamhon ke darmiyaan theher rahe hain


Ek kal mein ji rahe hain, ek kal se dar rahe hain
Jane itni shiddat se kyun khud se lad rahe hain

#FirstWorldProblems

मेरे जैसों की struggles भी गजब हैं आज कल
जो है उस की कीमत नहीं, जो ना मिले, चाहत है वही
हर चीज़ की home delivery है
purpose  के लिए कोई app नहीं
Ambition है, patience नहीं
Boredom से बड़ी कोई problem नहीं
कभी छोटी चीज़ों से भी घबरातें हैं
कभी किसी बात का भी डर नहीं
Problems का answer भी दारु में ढूँढ़ते हैं
Celebration का भी धुँआ है वही
Knowledge  है, wisdom नहीं
Anger बहुत है, empathy नहीं 
Relationships  हमेशा  complicated ही रहती हैं
पैसा चाहिए, पर पैसे की कीमत भी नहीं
Commitment सबसे censored "C-word" है
Options चाहिए decisions नहीं
बस चले तो हम जीना भी outsource कर दें
इस आसानी से मिली ज़िन्दगी में excitement enough नहीं । 

Inertia

हम हैं क्योंकि,  बस, हम हैं
हम ना होते तो बदलता कुछ नहीं ।
ग़म मेरा तेरे ग़म से कम सही
ग़म का ना होना, ख़ुशी तो नहीं ॥




I am, because, only just because I am
If I weren't to be, no one would give a damn
Your problems might be bigger than mine, my boy
But absence of sorrows is not joy.

I need too much

I need sleep. But the kind which is deep, tired and restful with no nightmares.
I need food. But the kind that you love every morsel of because you were famished and because it was well-earned.
I need work. But the kind which is challenging, meaningful, frustrating and satisfying at the same time.
I need friends. But the real ones, the 4 am ones, the always-there-for-you-in-good-bad-or-no-news ones. The non-Facebook kind.
I need a life. But not like this. One I can afford to waste. One which I pretend has some meaning by spewing gibberish that sounds profound.

Leadership lessons HBS couldn't teach me

Here's the thing about leadership voids. 

Either you step up and fill them. Or you step out, before they consume you.

Because no matter how swanky the ship and no matter far the currents carry you, eventually, a captain-less ship gets lost in the sea.

Losing

When I first saw you, and was attracted to you, I tried my best and I did my best not to get close to you. I tried my best not to fall in love with you. Not to picture our hands intertwined. Not to think of our lives together that could have been. Not to dream of you lying next to me every night. But, my best couldn't win. I fell and fell so hard that I can never go back to a point where I don't love you like crazy. I lost, but it was the sweetest loss in my whole life.
Because I won you. Because you made the dream come true and made me live it every second. You put your hand in mine and completed the picture. You made my reality a hundred times better than any imagination.
And now I can't sleep unless you are next to me. I want your love, your anger, your tantrums, your smile. All of your smiles, because they still make my heart skip a beat.
I want this forever.
I want to keep losing to you, everyday for the rest of my life.

What does the heart say?

Is intuition over-rated?
Under-rated?

Is there such a thing as intuition?

"Making gut calls" is one thing. What about "waiting for the gut to say something so you can make a call"?

Rationalization is SO tempting. There's little that's TERRIBLE. Yet choices have consequences. Overwhelming consequences.


Your choice is being watched. Make it well.

Dude. Do I need more pressure? Hmph.

Decisions decisions.