Tuesday, January 31, 2006

Jinxed

My head refused to move. It even refused to think that it wanted to move. Eyes didn't blink, hands didn't shake, and I don't know where my heart was.
There was nothing that I could see, yet everything was crystal clear. Never before have I seen vagueness with so much clarity that I could make out every single particle of the haze that enveloped the ambience, yet held me snug in a moment that refuses to die. An eternity passed in the next millisecond, and lips parted to lend the moment a rare strength, a strength that derives itself from weakness.
Breathe returned, hands stirred; I was cold, ice cold, but slowly convection was making me warmer. A smile, a few words, more nerves, more passion, and an illuminating translucency. It could have been a dream. And then, the lights went off. It wasn't a dream. It isn't one.
The touch proved to me I could still feel. But I knew I was numb, and within a few seconds I was so numb I didn't even know if I was numb. I don't remember anything after that. It was just too delicate to have survived in the junkyard of memory.
And now, the bubble has burst. There is only a tiny droplet that it has left behind. But it is enough to soak the whole of me. Forever. It's abstract again, but this time, I am a part of the abstract too. Not all dreams come true; not all dreams have to come true. Mine didn't. But it wasn't a dream.
It was a moment, a moment that was just meant to be. It was jinxed.

28 comments:

Anonymous said...

OOOOhhhhh!!!!!
I could almost see it vivdly in front of my eyes. Its pretty amazing that somehow people like us would also want to be in a state of oblivion with that one person we really love. I know you might not have written the post to convey such a message but this is what I inferred ,but then its Just Me

Anonymous said...

what was that .. a nightmare or something else ..didnt get it !!

Anonymous said...

As Arnav said in one of his posts, "It should be criminal to write as beautifully as this".

Anonymous said...

If it was a dream, then y not "Blessed" insted of "Jinxed"?

Anonymous said...

[Just me]
but i wrote it to convey exactly that. it's my moment, my dream, my reality.

[Hemu]
never mind!

[Vivek]
I'm FLATTERED.

[brood mode]
I'd nt answer this question. i do nt wish to explain this, also because the answer depends on individual understanding.
it's nt just mush, and hence it's nt blessed. not yet.

Anonymous said...

Oh splendid! Truly... I love how you can play with words... But I can surely understand what you try to say, what you are trying to describe... for the heart can only experience and not speak.
:)

Anonymous said...

very well expressed. i have felt the same too.

Anonymous said...

brilliant!!!!

Anonymous said...

Interesting. You sound like J.Krishnamurthy.

Anonymous said...

You sound like Taru Kapoor - my favorite writer. I'm, let's say, infatuated with your style of writing! B-)

Anonymous said...

[Sneha]
thanx. well said abt the heart!

[illusions, ada]
:) Thanx!

[Hiren]
Interesting. But how? as in what makes u compare?

[Raja]
Then I hope this infatuation doesnt shatter soon ment.

Anonymous said...

nice to see..the phoenix soaring high again

Anonymous said...

well as is ur habbit .. u play wid words pretty beautifully .

hehe .. i didnt get it much though [ have i evr been more honest :D ] . May be its a girl thing .... but i can sense tht momental thing ...... it happens ... a year passes in a moment .... a train might pass by u at 60 km/hr .. its a mere second or two .... but u managed to escape to a new world .. & u managed to comeback bbfr the train lost a view . And u say ... PHEW !! where was I .

And tht world can perplex u at times .... it can be as beautiful & fresh as a gals face [ cant help it :p ] who jst woke up on a frozwn winter morning ... or it can be as weird as a guy u jst woke up .. all cluttered & come out .. yawning .. mouth wiiiiiiiide open .. right on ur face [ eeeeeeeeeks ] .

I hope i made u understood tht i didnt got it much :p .

but u did played wid words .

Anonymous said...

nice to read those sacred emotions of the moment... i got it one the first glace the real meaning..
"It was a moment, a moment that was just meant to be" ... hmm one can only appreciate the depth of this line who has felt it... m just jinxed reading this blog of urs....

Anonymous said...

Jinxed? Does that word come out of habit?

Anonymous said...

???...have no clue of what it was !!

Anonymous said...

was a long moment then :)

nice post

Anonymous said...

[desperado]
Nice to see you back.

[anuj]
nice play dost. samajh to aa gaya, but why? :P
it's all about the moment. most joys are ephemeral. they survive only when u realsie this fact.

[abhishek khanna]
Thanx for droppin by here. do i know who u r?though if it's jinxed, ur comin here, then it's good/
Nice to know that u can understand it.

[The anon]

no habit. it's just apt!

[insane]
Never mind!

[voice]
thanx.

Anonymous said...

Hmmmmmmmm!!!

Anonymous said...

yaad karo.. mayb u know me...or mayb u forgot the sound of silence during ur hibernation....

Anonymous said...

Jinxed or Charmed? Cursed or Spellbounded? It is easy to confuse one thing for another.

Love your rhetorics

Anonymous said...

confusions are often lovable

Anonymous said...

kuch samja nahin...:(

Neha Sinha said...

Ummmmmm...what was that!

:-?

Anonymous said...

Nice template ..seems more like a bandi`s blog now :D

Grease Lightning said...

Yaar mazaa nahi aaya nayi template ko dekh kar!!!

adarsh said...

strange problem with this template.. i cannot click any link when i opened it in Netscape.. :(

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