The Good, The Bad and The Ugly.

If life moves like a sine curve, apparently the frequency just increased a 100 fold for me. I hope it is temporary though. Fluctuations leave me uneasy!

I have been giving one bad paper after the other, and probably with the exception of the humanities exam, each one has been more disappointing than the previous. I don't know if it is a good thing or bad that there's only one left now.

The nice things first. I had a lovely evening on Friday and another nice lunch yesterday. I finally watched Rang de Basanti, infact twice now, but if I say any more about how I found the movie that would be foolish.

Yesterday's lunch was essentially his treat, and together him and her and me had an amazing time at CP. I always knew she was unlike most people, so sweet, so friendly and so affectionate even towards almost strangers like me. and then I discovered even he is unlike most people, not just for his infamous I-don't-care-a-damn attitude about so many things[:P] but mainly because of his amazing spirit , the way with which he lives HIS way, the way that he can smile. People may like it or not, he doesn't care, and actually he shouldn't, and he makes me jealous the way he can smile, the way he can talk on and on, he way he can destroy himself deliberately with a smile because he wants to, the way he can be irresponsible and kiddish, and mature and responsible when HE wants to, the way he can fight like hell! Oh yes, did I mention both of them spent all the time fighting with each other[=))] and although I'm almost 5 yrs younger to both of them(in their words...achha sa pyaara sa samajhdar sa bacha hoon main[:P]) I was playing UMPIRE half the time. They kept trying to irritate each other and please me [:D] and we ate sooo much ki main khaate khaate mar gayi!!! And then hum sab ghoomte ghoomte mar gaye.

Thank you both of you for the lovely time and all the 'gyaan'!!!

And then started the bad part. God knows why I decided to return by the bus. I was tired and sleepy and sitting quietly and peacefully in 620, and then this guy, guy nahi uncle, 30-35ish, comes and sits next to me, with a biggish briefcase and buys a Rs.2 ticket as I bought one for IIT. Then 5 minute baad se after every five minutes he would say something like, "madam, you should not fiddle with your specs so much. Ruins eyesight!My brother....", "Could you shift aage/peechhe?", "Do you study in IIT?", "I hope you are sitting comfortably" etc etc. Don't even remember what all, I was so tired sleepy silent uninterested that I would either nod or not answer at all, till this happened. We were close to IIT when he suddenly said, "Madam, hum aapse dosti karna chahti hain!" I was almost jolted out of my sleep for it sounded so much like those "I wanna franship with u" Orkut scraps. Oh boy! I saw a Cyber Despo Live version! I could hardly reat for the next two seconds- maybe I was struggling with the apt gaali for the moment- and then I just managed a "I'd kill you" look and "What?Mind your own business mister!"

I stayed for another two seconds wondering if I had been dreaming and before I started screaming/ cursing I got up and sat on another seat behind. Suddenly he started saying things like "Bhagwan aapko khush rakhe. Aap salamat raho" etc etc and I felt so disgusted I just shrieked SHUT UP and ate a few curses. I look pretty scary otherwise also, and in that anger I must have scared Dracula too, so it's no surprise he immediately got up and got down an almost-moving bus. Half the people around were staring at me, the conductor looked sickeningly amused and thank God I had less than two stops to go. I was mumbling "ALL MEN ARE B*****DS" under my breath. Sorry, but I was just too blown off. I have seen many cheapsters and dealt with hundreds of eve teasers and in-the-bus specialists, but this was yet another specimen. What a pathetic place has Delhi become, especially considering nobody else around, who must have heard, said A WORD. I was only glad he had got down, which he should have much ago(the conductor could have at least booked him for paying less) and so it didn't get to a situation where I would have slapped him in broad daylight. And make no mistake, I could have done that, but I just wonder how many girls keep up with such nuisance and worse everyday!

So I return to college in this really foul mood, try studying for some time, give up, get to my hostel, try to relax and end up fighting with atleast three people over totally unconnected issues that all had to happen yesterday evening only. By the end of it I was so hurt, had cried so much, was feeling so guilty, felt so shattered because of something a friend had said, and had studied so absolutely nothing, that I almost slept off in tears, bachon ki tarah. And of course I ruined aaj ka exam so big time. I need a doctor, or a psychiatrist, or an executioner.

Or else the positive half cycle of the sine curve.

And yes, a little sanity for the men of this universe. Till then I don't want to talk to anyone. Infact Beware Of ME, I would probaly yell at anyone for no fault of theirs at the moment. And then feel sorry. So leave me alone...

..............and somebody tell that guy, an all of his tribe, to just fuck off !!!