Of Things That Break and Do not make a Sound

It's amusing how things that are more delicate than glass break without a sound, while glass itself creates a clamour loud enough for the whole world to hear and makes your hands colourful so that you can be caught red-handed. But the more delicate things mostly break even without a whisper, perhaps only a silent tear- shed or unshed. You escape being caught, but the face is a give-away so often that everyon knows you're the culprit anyway. Even the mirror. The crime may be hidden, the criminal never is.

One of the most crucial of these delicate things is trust. I've told myself 183 times not to trust anybody, and failed 184 times. I trust the same people again, little less or little more, or I trust newer people. Then I get hurt, little less or little more, or in a new way altogether, and 183 becomes 184 and 184 becomes 185(essentially, add one....if hurt==huge, add a few more). But frankly, it's not me alone. So many people have trusted others an regretted their foolishness later, but one cannot just do away with it because this world sould no work withou trust. If everyone stops trusting each other, it would be a catastrophe, and I'm optimistic enough to assume it would never happen. Perhaps I need to become wiser and maturer so that I know whom to trust and whom not to, but I don't think I have the patience.

183++;

The other thing that shatters extremely soundlessly and painfully, is respect. A lot of people meet me and I get to know them from a position of respect, i.e. they get my respect by default and from there proceed to either lose it or increase by virtue of their actions. And when sometimes some of them lose it drastically in a minute, you only feel foolish about yourself, and sooo hurt. I do not want to get sceptical and cynical such that I start being suspicious of veryone I meet, but if things keep getting shattered like that and I keep getting "moments of complete gyaan", I dont think I can hold out much longer.

The third, is the poetic cliche' of the broken heart that breaks without sounds and leaves one so numb, so destroyed and so hurt that no other pain looks worse.

And I'd not even go into this. I'm at a loss of words.