Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Things hardest to let go-II

The emptiness has set in already. Thirteen more months, 382 more days in IIT to go (hopefully not getting a degree extension). Phew! And the good times have already slipped past. Dual, or 5yr integrated degree that IIT dishes our, sucks for the simple reason that it has an extra year where you're the ghosts of the campus, who hardly anyone knows and nobody cares about. All your friends have left, most of your courses are over, you've even been given a farewell as the "batch of 2008" and nobody needs you anymore. But you still have to live here one summer and two semesters an oblivious life. Hmmm...but how do you let go of the habit of running into your friends in the institute who've suddenly gone too far, at least physically, or of msging them for momos and maggi, or of random nightouts? Why's it so lonely out here? Where are the people?
...and suddenly, there's nothing to do. A stupid project can only take so much of your time. What do I do about my workaholism? Especially when I've gone out to refuse all regular extra-curricular stuff for the coming year, the kinds I've been doing forever in IIT. Suddenly, there's so much time, and no activity. I'd planned to start working on a book, but so far I can't get myself to write a word. The plots in my head dont look convincing; I'm just so uninspired. Seriously, folks, give me an idea. Or a summer job which I can do with my project without traveling much in the heat. Or social work? Anything...

22 comments:

aditi said...

Hmmm....people do vanish in summers....take some days off to chill out and relax the brain! Then plans and ideas will flow freely...

Divesh said...

Itna bura nahi hota hai fifth year... chill :)

Anonymous said...

Go to your home or a hill station, take a break from the heat of delhi. You'll come back with all your guns blazing.
And the break may offer you some new ideas for your book :)

Vartika said...

Take a chill pill! Easier said than done I know...take a weekend off...visit a new place...come back and start giving shape to the plot! Now who wouldn't love a hard bound public diary!
Brace yourself girl! As you said...382 days...long time!:)

Chakoli said...

u r cute dear:-)))(This was for the last post:-)))

Hmmm...u want work.... how about joining a call centre??

but then u wud have to go fr night shifts as well..
try being a pizza gal...or mcd's gal...?? boring naaaa.....

Writing a book is a good idea... but u usually get inspired when u meet people... isnt??so go out.. drench urself in heat....;-))

life is good said...

how about an India tour on cycle ;P

take care

desperado said...

all i would say is write down those thoughts....rather than debating about them in your head :)

Phoenix said...

[aditi]
hmm...tryign to do just that...do nthn for a while..and relaxxxxx...and hope soemthing strikes after that..

[divesh]
Consolations...hmmm.. :)

[anand]
My home's in delhi, and trip bhi cancel ho gayi! :( Just chilling out to take a break...fir dekhte hain

Phoenix said...

[vartika]
:D :D okie dokie

waise aap to delhi aa rhi ho na ;)
hard bound public diary...lol...itna crap kaise sehen hoga papers se :P

Long time, hopefulyl good time :D

[chakoli]
Thanks! (why dont any guys think that way! :P :P)

Call centre..pizzas...na...i need to have fun and enjoy wat i do...ye sab kaise karoon...but elhi heat..yuck....hostel mein already kafi drenching hai...

people..hmm...koi mil jao pls!!

Phoenix said...

[life is good]
Now that's one whacky adventurous idea.... :)

[desperado]
all that crap?? :O
Gawd...:P

Anonymous said...

That's it, now we're meeting over coffee for the weekend!

veikiin said...

Free time. hmmm. Let me see, what would I do..or what have I done in past when faced with such a predicament .. ok here goes ::

1. Learn French.
2. Join Salsa class.
3. Become a fitness freak and spend toooo much time in the gym.
4. Review all the restaurants in the city.
....

all these and more. :-)

Vik said...

I can understand. I'm a fellow ghost. :)

(But unlike you, I'm a weed too!)

vibhav said...

Well I'd only say write more and more blog posts! :P Maybe you could revive your "General Observation Inc" and your Love-Guru classes etc, and write more of those second and third year kind of posts. But it's not necessary, write anything!

Maybe also work on your book, read more books and start selecting some for your book-cafe! Maybe do nothing for a change!

Phoenix said...

[akshay]
:)
Sounds like a lecture date. :)
Chalo, ye bhi sahi..

[veikiin]
Thanks for the suggestions you know..
let's see...french I already know the basics, ab to bhoole bhi lagi hoon...not fun anymore..
Salsa...mmm...havent danced since 7 yrs or smthng...could learn...but i really thought id keep that for the last sem.
Fitness freak to main kabhi nhi ban sakti, besides i am soooo lay u wont believe it, but i do need to work out/diet or smthng...long walks are already on...:)

Restaurants, :D foodiebay.com hai na

Phoenix said...

[vik]
Dont call urself a weed... no ghost is useful...u at least have a life of ur own..

[vibhav]
Haan, the kind of posts u liked...you know these days i keep getting instances when smone wd point out hw i was in second yr and how it is differet now...god i didnt even realise it...wat happened?
on another note, vik here will kill me for those toi types loveguru things :P I liked general observation inc though. Yeah, reading i am trying to catch up on...fav timepass anyway
Doing nothing :D :d :D

Sayani said...

ur post reminds me my degree era ,those farewells ....and those friendship vows....i really missed my canteen but then i love the life am leading now ...don't worry everything will come out in flying colors

Phoenix said...

[S ghosh]
Hey, long time!
Well, as I said, this post will have a little bit of everyone's memories in it, we all go thru these partings. Just leaving would have been a little easier than being left back, but in the long run, it would be all good. Life is still at a high :)

Anonymous said...

Nahiii, no lecture, promise!! ;)

daman said...

farewell's are always full of tears .. even in my case ... the place i hated for 4 years surely made me cry .... and i do miss the sudden delhi rains ...... but i am gearing up for the treacherous rains in b'bay :)

Vik said...

I read your older posts many a times.. they are really cool.. two years back, the love-guru in you was humorist. Now she is only a pacifist. :)

Anyway, just to make a comment here, I was browsing through some older pages and found this:
Kaagaz pe bikhri syahi ki tarah
Mohabbat mein do pal ki judai ki tarah
Karti hai nafrat wajood tak se mere
Ye duniya aj-sachchai ki tarah...

Really liked it!

Phoenix said...

[akshay]
:)

[daman kohli]
it's more heavy than tearful, overwhelming than grievous...it's just that empty feeling, and yes i love this place, but the people make up most of it..

thank god delhi has rains...

[vik]
Interesting. I know where my humor died though, that's the biggest reason I dont wanna start on a book till that comes back. Even if it's ToI, it has to be laughable :P
And I'm still cool/...somewhat :)

that verse is one of my favorites too.