Monday, October 13, 2008

Unhappiness

There are few people, a certain kind - a small minority, hopefully - that are just plain unhappy people. As opposed to another at the opposite end of the spectrum, the people who are always happy, find something to cheer, and smile to sleep more often than not. The unhappy people, on the other hand, are doomed to forever search for the dark cloud above the silver lining, doomed to find something to cry to sleep about every night. They are suckers for grief, so much that even others' grief easily flows through and resonates in them. They are good shoulders to cry on, because they're always looking for shoulders.

Nothing is ever enough, ever all right. Happiness by definition is transient for them, a treasured impulse which possibly can't last more than a few nanoseconds, an impulse they are doomed to run after and try too hard to keep. They survive on being bitter, on self-pity, on guilt. The drama is good. They think. They feel. They suspect. They whine. And they repel happiness, the same thing they run after, because they do not understand its true nature.

They're dangerous, because they contaminate every aura they intercept. They just carry the negative energy around, until the day they have dissolved themselves in their own worthless tears, until the day their personal seething fires have burnt them.
They're attractive, like Danger itself.
Thank God not all people are like them. But what is saddest is, they're who they are, to a large extent because of their own choice. Such a waste.

24 comments:

conufsed said...

Emo kid.

catalyst said...

......and then there are also those who become precisely like them for extended time periods.
but why such uncharacteristic contempt from you ?
there are pessimists and there are optimists, and there are sadists and there are masochists with those fake smiles and with all that pain inside and with that uncompromising derision towards life half the time, if not always. What about them ? ....all what seems as choices willingly made is sometimes the inability to survive any other way ......... detachment, inveterate objectivity and indifference should rule the world perhaps as I see in your words. How can it be generalized that passing phases ( prolonged sometimes) make people indifferent to those small subtleties which you can only smile at. whatever...

veikiin said...

Interestingly all of us would think of ourselves to be in the "Happy Always" category or atleast somewhere near it. Most of us even after being "always unhappy" would not admit to such an outlook in life. Adoring ourselves is what we all do best :-)

Pallavi said...

Beautifully written.

Phoenix said...

[conufsed]
Not just that. Not just the weepy music self-pitying hair-on-face somehow-not-gay teenager. That's a restrictive suicide. Fundamentally unhappy people come in all sizes and shapes and are far less recognizable to an external eye.

[catalyst]
Maybe. I was just talking about a certain section, minority, of people. The rest all exist. Flip-flop, interchange, play pretend. Whatever. Not talking of them. And I reserve contempt at my discretion. Personal generalization, as well.
Why they make the choices is an interesting argument, but the people I talk of, are the way I say, and not act it. This by no means conclude that objectivity and indifference reigns supreme.

Phoenix said...

[veikiin]
Not all of us trust me. Especially because locating somewhere in the vast middle isnt all that uncomfortable.

[pallavi]
:) thanks

daman said...

i think illusions can be misleading..i have seen many of my friends who look happy from outside ...but deep inside they are unhappy and sad ... and i would not like to generalize or brand people as "unhappy" ... there are different pahses in one's life ....a phase where one can be extremely satisfied and a phase where you can doubt yourself ....but i think we need all kind of people in our society ...else surroundings would be to stagnant..... and i hope that i am not that "unhappy" kind :)

Prasad Narulkar said...

goodd!!!
i think im beginin to fall in this category!!!!
somethin def to think abt...

nicely written...

catalyst said...

one can hardly argue against judgments, reservations and instincts, so be it ..... :) i withdraw my protest.

Kunal said...

I have indeed seen people more or less the same as described. Makes you think they just cant ever be happy with themselves. I am not angry at them, even if they spread negative energy(I am mostly immune to them). But, I do pity them for their lack of sense or vision to see some good things in an otherwise already awful and deteriorating social security and mental peace...

Move on!!

nitin said...

well said buddy! lets hear it for the felicitous ppl ;-)

cheers!
nitin
my blog: www.meshared.blogspot.com

Ekta said...

all you can do is avoid such people and wish them a little more unhapiness so that they can be happy.

really,i cannot settle with hapiness or unhapiness

the whole thrill is in between them..i guess..

vibhav said...

Many people are neither happy nor sad, they repel both, because they understand neither. Unhappy people have at least reason and choice.

Anonymous said...

true.

I know a lot like those...and I guess they're unhealthy company!

Anonymous said...

Finally, finally, someone agrees with me! Don't let the expert commentors shake your opinion!! (* tears of joy *0

:)

Pavitra said...

Very true. i liked the part where you called them dangerous. Very few recognise their impact on ur energy, attitude and thinking and step away from them soon enuf to escape being burnt.

Good u've learnt to recognise them :-)

aditi said...

They are also dangerous to themselves...they probably need a good dose of common sense!

Vik said...

Every object, every being,
is a jar full of delight.
Be a conoisseur,
and taste with caution.

~Rumi

Phoenix said...

[daman kohli]
There are indeed many people, who look happy and are not, or who whine a lot but are basically content. Deception is a beautiful intricacy of human behavior. And yet, there is a section that is just so incapable of sustaining happiness, there are nothing but unhappy. To me, at least. To other people, phases happen. To other people, contentment and disappointment are both real transient possibilities. To them, one is a law of nature, the other an illusion. I am being harsh, I know, but I do not seek to defend my judgement.

[prasad]
I hope not. Optimism helps.

[catalyst]
:) Truly a judgemental statement. Not something I do often, but then there are so many things I do only sometimes. And stay stubborn about them anyway.

Phoenix said...

[kunnu]
Good for you that you have the immunity. Pity, yes maybe that is something they deserve. Though I have come to accept them as just
that-kind-of-people. Anger or pity doesnt serve. Move on, yeah :)

[free mind]
Thanks for ur visit.

[purple deepens]
Long time!
Strange irony there, wish them unhappiness for happiness. :) True. Stay good, and enjoy life. It's all about the greys anyway.

Phoenix said...

[vibhav]
you sound a wee bit jealous. :P Certainty isn't always a good thing. But yes, most of us have a very poor understanding of either. Most of us are more accepting, though to what comes.

[chandni]
More than anyone else, they're just dangerous for themselves, and for Hope and Faith in this world.

[Akshay]
I know how you feel. You're one of the best examples I know of the opposite end of the spectrum, and your optimism is infectious. Touchwood!

Phoenix said...

[prude]
I'm not sure I've really learnt to recognize them. I'm not sure it's entirely possible to escape being burnt. I'm not sure if I entirely mind being burnt.

[aditi]
To themselves, more than any other. Common sense, sigh.

[vik]
:)
And bask in the pleasure
Be warmed in the glory
The heat may burn sometimes
But it's worth the story.

catalyst said...

i am acutely aware of it :) unlike most other things about which i am not so certain ;)

Anonymous said...

Interesting blog.

With regards to the current post though, there are a small minority of people that are depressed because of neurochemical imbalances. There are others who are depressed and sink further because in India in particular, mental health is not yet given the importance it should be given, and the majority seem to believe that a person can just "get over it". This in turn stops them from seeking therapy and thereby, treating the depression.

Just my thoughts... :)

Cheers!