Incomparable loves

Lots of loving lovable loves
Loiter around in the throes of the heart
Who is to say which ones are greater
Love is always perfect, love is always flawed

Pyaar to aakhir pyaar hi hai
Naapein parkhein kaise koi
Ishq waala love bhi love hai
Aur pyaar hi hai khamoshi ka saath

Loves, unlike lovers, do not hate each other
They're far too self-obsessed to even care
The love for the moon doesn't rival that for night
They both just ignite, they both are just there

Mere pyaar se tera pyaar na kam na zyaada
Gehraiyaan na naapi jaayein inchi tape ke bharose
Na gin sakte hain aansu, na lafzon ko wazan karein
Is jado-jahid mein aksar pyaar hi jata hai bikhar

Some loves are fleeting, some undying
Some flicker with the candlelight and the wail
Some weaken, some strengthen, some draw off each other
Some give life and some lead down a dark trail

Gusse se bhi pyaar hai, teri muskaan pe bhi marte hain
Teri aankhon ke kone ke jugnu pe bhi hain kaayal
Pyaar kaun sa is duniya mein mukammal ho jaye
sab kismat ka hai khel

Book Review: The Krishna Key

Ever since I finished reading The Krishna Key, I have been wondering why is it a work of fiction. The closest I've got is, "Because Da Vinci Code sold x million copies". But The Krishna Key is much more a book of history and mythology, and more precisely the grey zone between the two interpretational art/science forms, than the latter ever was. In terms of sheer quality of writing and narrative though, even Da Vinci Code was better than this.

Ashwin Sanghi has a reputation of his own, though Krishna Key had come especially recommended. It appeals, I am certain, to a certain reader demographic - the religious, the non-fiction-oholics, the conspiracy theorists. But it manages to sound a bit too contrived, too forced, and by the end too preachy for even a reader like me who likes narratives that try to find a hidden layer behind notions we have and the world we see around us. 

In brief, the book brings to fore the oft-repeated questions - Did Krishna really exist, or is it just mythology? Did Mahabharata really happen? It throws in tons of evidence, theories, stories and interpretations that make you want to believe in its hypothesis. The theories in itself are easily the most interesting part of the book, which makes me believe the writer should have chosen a better format than the force-fit fiction tale with too many stereotypical elements and "forced" surprises. 

The protagonists of the book are unlikely hero. The women of the story are smart and sharp, the men confused and the motivations laughable. For a fair while, you don't even realise who are supposed to be the leads, which in itself is not a bad thing.. Part of it is weak character development, some elements of which appear so late they appear forced. Mostly, I do not like the dialogue. The plot is kinda plausible, especially once it gets over the hindi-filminess of the first half. But the dialogue is virtually non-existent, because the monologues take it over. At a point, you wonder, why are they all running? What are they trying to get to? Why now? Why so urgent? Why so SERIOUS?

This book is great if you're interested in history, mythology, the one world-one civilization paradigm, the supremacy of Hinduism (in a very twisted way), and hell, who doesn't love a conspiracy theory. Dont read it for the story it tries to tell you though. Not worth it.

This review is a part of the Book Review Program for Indian Bloggers!

Nights

Exhausted
I fall down on the bed
But sleep evades
When will the questions die?
Unchanged
Stays the toughest one
Have I changed
Over years? Over weeks? Why?
Peace
Could probably be bought
Can faith be restored?
Should I quit, or should I try?
Tears
Appear uninvited anyway
And clean the eyes
Off hazy dreams that pry
Sleep
I still pray for
As answers don't come
In guilt, pain, confusion I cry.

Abhi abhi

Another place I dream to reach
And I walk another path
Abhi abhi to dil ki suni hai
Abhi na karo zamaane ki baat

Half-truths

Are half-truths lies? If so, are they "better" lies?

Imagine yourself where you repeatedly tell a half-truth to someone because you think they'd not like or understand the full truth, or because you think they'd have a 'problem' with it but in your head is completely legit, just a point-of-view issue, so they don't really need to know. It is likely the "someone" here is important enough that you care how they think/feel/perceive you. How does telling those half truths make you feel? E.g. Telling your parents you're going out with friends while you're going out with a certain 'friend' because you don't want them to know/ overreact. Or telling your best friend you're going out with boring office colleagues when you really have to go out with a new close friend because it is quite awkward. Telling your husband you're crashing at your (girl) friend's place tonight, while really its one of your guy friends you'd crash at, because you're not doing anything wrong, just avoiding an inconvenient conversation.

I don't think it'd be hard to imagine what I ask for many of us. We say convenient half truths and little lies ALL the freaking time. So what's the big deal?

The big deal is to me, at least, sometimes these little lies rankle a lot. We say them because we care about the other person's feelings or beliefs, and want to sidestep rather than hurt them. We do it anyway because we're convinced we're not doing anything wrong, but we also would rather have them not know than know the full truth. It's a really fine line. Most days indifference is probably ok. Some days it's not. Some days the guilt wakes me up at night. Some days I wonder how I would feel if I were being led to. And then I realize I would "understand" quite easily and not 'think' much of it, but the way the 'lie' would make me feel is a very different kind of pain. The pain that lingers. The pain which 'knows' and yet where you're quiet because you understand.
And then I wonder, wasn't pain what we are avoiding in the first place anyway? Why damage trust for a little bit of convenience?
Isn't trust TOO precious for that?

Is it too hard to do a direct honest conversation upfront, battle through a bit of temporary heartache if any, and live peacefully truthfully thereafter?

Chaand

Ek chaand mera
Ek tha jahaan ka
Ek pal churaya
Ik wahin gira tha
Ek aasmaan ka tukda
Us pal ka rehnuma tha
Kuch aur hi tha manzar
Kuch aur hi sama tha
Aankhon mein chaand chamka
Ek boond mein tha chhalka
Dil ko chubha naya ek
Ehsaas halka halka
Lafzon ne sath chhoda
Chupchaap se gila tha
Ek pal maine churaya
Ek pal wahin gira tha


Ek chaand mera
Ek chaand jahaan ka
Us chaandni mein mujh ko
Mera aashiyaan mila tha...

Baat-cheet

Shikayat lekar tumhari gaye the khuda ke paas, 

kambakht khuda bhi tumhara aashiq nikla...

Mizaaz aashiqui ka chhaya hai lagta hai aj kal

Zara hum bhi to jaanein khaas itna kaun hai...

Us ka jo pucha hai to bas itna jaan lo. 

Bahut khaas, bahut khaas, bahut khaas hai koi.

Shabdon ko kisi ke naam kar pate 

Kash koi khaas itna humare paas bhi hota

Ishq karna hai to ubikharne Ka hunar bhi seekho

Ishq main hadse aksar badey sangeen hotey hai

Wo Haadsa Wo Pehli Mulaakat Kyaa Kahoon...

Itni Ajab Thi Soorat Haalat Kya Kahoon

Koi bhi ho ham-safar, yoon na ho Khush is qadar... 

Ab ke logon mein wafa hai kam, zara aahista chal

Bewafa is duniya mein, wafa ki umeed kam hi hai..

kuch pal hi mil jayein mohabbat ke, to zindagi kat jaye shayad

This happened on Twitter, love the banter. There was a time the blog had a lot more of this, so putting this here to remember. Not all shers are original and many are not mine, of course.

Book Review: The Devotion of Suspect X

When I picked up "The Devotion of Suspect X", I had my expectations low of the crime thriller, despite the 2mn readers' claim on the cover, and despite my general love for International literature from Japan, inspired from Haruki Murakami's stables. Having read it twice over now, I stand corrected, and yet I realize I probably started from the best entry point in this novel which has subtlety and subtext all over itself, my favorite kind of story-telling. 

The book is a reasonably well-paced crime novel that keeps you hooked till the end, even though you know the whodunnit (as well as whydunnit and howdunnit) in the first 50 pages of the story. Despite that, the twist is something you'd never ever guess and the subtlety of hints makes you want to smile when it is revealed towards the end. The plot is beautifully crafted with the protagonists being a couple of geniuses, a hapless mother-daughter and a key question "Is it more difficult to devise an unsolvable problem or to solve one?" There's generous amount of maths, science, philosophy and logic colluding all over this fine piece of literature, but they all fit beautifully and never overwhelm a reader who might in normal circumstances shy away from those subjects.

Come to think of it, in fact, the only thing that seems out of place in hindsight is the title of the book, whose impact I think has been lost entirely in translation. 

Yeah, I would have probably just called this book "Devotion". Because that is the only word for Ishigami's terrifying simplicity of action, because that is the only word that describes the enormity of what hits Yasuko in the end, and because I am sure that is what the author would have been drenched in to produce a book like this. 

The characters are wonderfully, realistically drawn and yet kept semi-closed in a way that forces you to imagine what the protagonists must be going through and question their actions (or lack thereof) rather than doling it out on to the reader on a platter to just gobble. My heart goes out to Ishigami, the simple genius mathematician, for whom you never once stop feeling "wronged" as a reader, from beginning to end, to the extent that you feel a vague anger for pretty much every other character in the book. In my opinion, pulling off that kind of subtle empathy in a book is kudos to the author, and will remain the most lasting memory in my mind.

Go read! Available here on Flipkart.

This review is a part of the Book Review Program for Indian Bloggers!

बर्फ

Shararat bhari nazron ne tumhari
Aankhon mein meri haya bhar di
Ek hi pal mein in bewafa nainon ne
Mere dil ki raza bayaan kar di
Hothon ko dabeeche daanton tale
Main muskaan ko taish se chhupati hoon
Rok lo haath pakad mujhe aaj zara
Isi umeed mein mud ke door jaati hoon
Paakar kareeb tumko, khud ko yoon kho rahi hoon
Maala koi toot kar bikharti hai jaise
Patton par padi os fisalti hai jaise
Sooraj ki oat mein barf pighalti hai jaise

शरारत भरी नज़रों ने तुम्हारी

आँखों में मेरी हया भर दी 

एक ही पल में इन बेवफा नैनों ने

मेरे दिल की रज़ा बयाँ कर दी

होठों को दबीचे दांतों तले

मैं मुस्कान को तैश से छुपाती हूँ

रोक लो पकड़ हाथ आज मुझे ज़रा

इसी उम्मीद में मुड़ के दूर जाती हूँ

पाकर करीब तुमको, खुद को यूं खो रही हूँ

माला कोई टूट कर बिखरती है जैसे

पत्तों पर पड़ी ओस फिसलती है जैसे

सूरज की ओट में बर्फ पिघलती है जैसे। 

Mann

Tumhe zulfon mein apni uljhane ka mann hai
Tumhe aur paas thoda bulane ka mann hai
Tadapta hai kitna ye dil tumhare liye
Nazron se aaj tumhe batlane ka mann hai